"I wanted it to be special."

Ryan and I as cacti. I'm on the left.

Big girl at the DMV.

you get stoned like death in the bible

I did some pages in my sketchbook but not my homework
Taylor came over
I told her why I'm sad
she put her hand on my knee which was weird so we laughed
We listened to Why?
and talked about which sequins to wear on New Years, cardigan or bustier.
I cooked some vegetables
she got ready to go out
she tried to eat my mushroom
I said no there's only one
she tried to eat a carrot I said no there's butter on it (she's vegan)
I told her she looked like a geisha (she did) and now it's time for bed.

If you're in San Diego on Friday

Which I actually won't be. I'll be in the sky. and New York.

it's your birthday drink your pee take off your shirt day

My mom made me this book. Best present ever, no contest.

I'm 21 which is weird because I should be about eight.

See what I mean? Rayon roses on leopard that perfectly matches the Rachel Zoe-worthy Chanel glasses. Like, I've been really over-indulgent with the Photo Booth recently, but it's my birthday and I can do whatever I want today.



puppy puppy puppy

I take it back.

I hate L.A. I will never move back to L.A. I spent most of the day just sitting cause driving is done seated. We did go to Ooga Booga though which was a huge highlight.

Sarah Rara!
I got an Ooga Booga pin to put on my Mary Meyer tote right next to the Keith Haring pin. Taylor says pins are punk rock but mine are. . . . ~artsy~

LETS PRETEND LIKE THIS IS THE FIRST TIME

I woke up at 7 am, which you could attribute to being on East Coast time, but I went to sleep at 3 am, so there is no logic or justification for anything right now. And oh my god the light is beautiful and my backyard looks like this magical dirt-scape of pottery and painted things, reminiscent of the Harriet the Spy garden of recyclables (you remember that scene, right?). And my room! Fur collars and scarfs and circular glasses and ripped tights and leather skirts (ok, one leather skirt) and etc etc that I forgot I had. I love getting dressed here. There are no expectations, no one that needs to see me but me. I don't want to drown in black here.

Circle glasses that I never got my prescription put into!

Knit neck thing I made using only my fingers!

I'm going to walk with puppy to Vinaka now! and DAV, most amazing thrift store here opens at 9.

So see you l8r aka talk to you soon, I need to document this collection of art my mom has amassed over the last 5 months. Also she's been building trees which are pretty awesome.

P.S.

I need to become bicoastal immediately (not going to happen really). 14th street and its garbage, urine, and fried chicken is the absolute bane of my existence.

These are by Julie Morstad and I love love love them!

My flight was really delayed and I won't be in San Diego until 2 am now. I just ate airport frozen yogurt that tasted like vanilla Ensure, though it was "Cookies-N-Cream" flavor. I've got the New York Times to read and an (almost) brand new sketchbook, but I've also got the internet so I'm watching episode after episode of Seinfeld instead.

c is for cardboard cat, d is for dog and donkey

r is for rooster.

every place I've lived in order

images via Google Maps

It's November in New York and I'll be back in Southern California in ten days, but who needs to when Sunday was the most beautiful day in the world, trailing through the woods in Central Park. I was barefoot and bare-shouldered and it was warm.

These photos by Veronica Rafael, the middle one of me and Diwa from Sunday. I'm excited to see how the rest came out; I think it was very eerie but pretty.

My favorite girls live in San Francisco.

Photos of Delaney, Kendall, and Muriel, collaged by Muriel. Cat painting by I'm not sure who, probably Delaney (educated guess!).

There is something exciting about all of these for me because they are not overly labored or thought-out. They're not created by anyone who's in art school and is drilled on compositions and color harmonies. Maybe it's the appeal of the "naive" they all liked so much with Rousseau and them, but I feel like my girls (yes they're mine, all my little sisters) are effortlessly creating what others, myself included, work hard at. I'm certainly more dexterous with an exacto knife, but doesn't it seems so labored in comparison?

Yes and no. I'm not sure or I don't know. But I do know Taylor and I were sitting here tonight looking at these pictures like shit, we wish we were that cool.

~shoutout~ to my mom who made & mailed me the best scarf ever. Sitting in my room and wearing it has become an activity in itself, in lieu of doing homework. But don't call me unproductive: I have also vidchatted, applied lipstick, eaten a bowl of soup, reapplied lipstick, and redone my paper outline. The first outline was graded 6/10 and deemed "interesting but unfocused." Is that telling of my character?

oh and shoutout to Michelle again--check out that checkerboard pattern!! Is that knit 5, pearl 5? Pearl 5, knit 5?

gothpom

like a miniature cross between a bear and a kitten